The truth is that we don’t know the future. We have ideas, we have hopes and expectations, but in all honesty, we have no clue.
A year ago my days started in Rome then after my last chocolate sorbeto I jumped on the plane to Budapest. I had no idea that a year later I will be sitting in Upstate New York, currently rained in.
A year ago I was struggling with chronic headaches. I was trying to cure myself with cleanses, restrictive pure diets and I was about to get ready to start an elimination diet in hopes of finding a food sensitivity ending all my troubles. No food sensitivities were found, btw. I had no idea that today I will be sitting here headache-free. I had no idea that I will not be eating so restrictive and that extreme pure anymore.
A year ago health and life coaching was only a dream. A far away dream that I knew would be reality someday, but I didn’t expect it to be reality so soon. Today I am a health and happiness coach. I have a website I am proud of. I write articles and blogs inspiring many (thank you for the positive comments). I am making a difference. I am doing my passion and creating my dream life.
Sometimes I tend to forget though that I don’t know the future.
My brain gets filled with ‘what if’-s and fears. What if my headaches come back? That’s just an example. Or where am I going to be living? As a nomad I never have exact plans. At this point in time I really have no idea where I will be post August. Being a nomad has it’s perks. I love this traveling life. I need my freedom. But sometimes I get scared.
Sometimes I just want my control. I want to control my future and know everything exactly.
The truth is that I can’t control the future. (Neither can you.)
A year ago I was flying to Budapest. I took the taxi to my grandma’s apartment. She wasn’t there. She was visiting her sister abroad. I enjoyed taking advantage of her big apartment before she came back too about two weeks later.
While I didn’t know then where I will be today, I expected her to be in my life. My grandma died in April. It was unexpected. It was sudden. She started to feel weak and got admitted to my hospital. I changed my travel plans and found myself in Hungary again. Got off the plane, went straight to the hospital. I found a very ill woman there. I found out she was very sick. She was declining quickly and she died within three weeks.
This was not something I expected. This was not something I could have planned for – or wanted to plan for for that matter.
It doesn’t matter how much I ever wanted to control the future I could’ve not predict anything that is going on my life right now: not the good and not the bad.
Something I have to realize that the only thing that is real right now is the present.
The past is gone.
The future is unpredictable.
But the present is here.
So why not just live in the present?!
It is difficult. Believe me, I know. Just scroll back a bit, I told you that I am not all perfect, Miss Zen, Miss Buddha. Being in the present is a learning process for me too.
But I invite you to join me on this learning process.
Do this: every time you catch yourself obsessing on the future, trying to control it or being overly fearful, just say “stop”. Take a slow deep breath (with eyes closed is even better) and just be for a moment. Feel grateful for the present.
For just one moment enjoy the present.
(Written on June 25, 2014)